When the impact of our sharing is not fully taken in because we’ve opted to jump immediately towards solutioning, fixing, or rushing, we actually don’t get to the roots of the problems that we intend to solve. We get half solutions based on partial truths.
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While it is much easier to remain on the sidelines, until we are all willing to take on the fight for justice for groups we do not belong to as our own work, we will never achieve necessary progress. There is no gray area — choosing not to do what is right is tacit support for those doing what is wrong.
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As we enter the last leg of the summer, many Americans are faced with the possibility of a lot more social interaction in the next few months. But make no mistake: the society that emerges from the pandemic will be vastly different than the one that went in. Thanks to social media, it has been easier than ever for people to be kept abreast of the barriers and plights experienced by marginalized communities. Here are a few tips for how to navigate conversations while minimizing harm…
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Justice and accountability are inextricably linked. When it comes to operationalizing justice, we must always center those who are most impacted by harm done within an organization and be accountable for our missteps. In a dominant culture of avoidance, blame and denial, this can feel like a tall order. How can we enter into restorative dialogue that can heal wounds and bring accountability? How can we embody the values of justice, equity and inclusion in our day-to-day work?
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When we focus on the individual in our society’s view on “worked hard,” we are losing a vital but often overlooked part of success: the “Us.” We need to celebrate, recognize, and act upon the fact that an individual’s success is intertwined with the systems we live in — systems that in turn have their own unique conglomeration of power, privileges, opportunities, and adversities. Think about it this way: How can you pull yourself up by your bootstraps, if you never had “boots” to begin with?
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When you encounter someone who expresses something you consider to be ignorant or problematic, pause, and ask yourself: What about your experiences provided you with the knowledge and context you have about the topic? How might this person’s exposure to similar experiences have been different? This sounds simple, but it is one of the most difficult practices to cultivate in reality. The LARA method is a four-step approach to help you with this.
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During my first day at an internship I once held, each of us was asked to tell a joke as part of our introduction to the staff and the rest of the intern cohort. This fun activity proceeded as planned… until the last intern told a hurtful, racist “joke” about poverty and food in another culture. It was followed by an awkward silence during which we all winced and looked around, uncertain how to respond. One of the staff eventually said, “Wow. Well. Let’s continue with our agenda.”
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“It’s so easy to be seduced by one’s own subordinated group identities.” These were words shared with me by a mentor and senior practitioner in this work. He was referring to social group identity and the ways in which our experiences and hyper-awareness around our non-dominant/subordinated group identities could influence our capacity to fully own and understand the power or privilege we have as a result of our dominant group memberships.
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I’ll admit it: I love grabbing the occasional $5.00 latte at a super artsy coffee shop—often located in a newly “revived” part of the urban neighborhood I live in. Words on billboards and signs in front of new small businesses advertise the “revival” of a “rough” neighborhood “replenishing” the economy. I pay for my latte, and I turn left toward my apartment. But what happens if I turn right?
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In D&I work, we often offer suggestions to the effect of: “This is an ongoing journey,” or “Expect a lack of closure.” In essence, both phrases can be boiled down to one statement that would by now be cliché if it wasn’t so essential to continue restating: This work is never done. In this post, I’ll be unpacking some common distancing statements that people may use when trying to assure others that they are on the “right side” of the issues.
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“Why are you upset? Everyone has a right to freedom of expression.” I ask: Is freedom of speech truly available to everyone in this country? If not, what does this tell us? In a world where we must question the physical safety of those who challenge a dominant majority, I suggest: this is no kind of “freedom.”
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“I love all people as the Bible commands, but I also cannot condone homosexuality.” “Marriage is reserved for a man and a woman according to the Bible.” “The practice of homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teaching.” Attempting Bold, Inclusive Conversations® in faith-based communities can be especially difficult on value-based topics like human sexuality.
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